http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wg2RwLr8PlM
please tell me how i can improve
First of all, I would recommend you use proper punctuation and capitalization in a post: many people will simply ignore a post that is written without regard to punctuation rules in english. Also, it is a turn off to people to create a new thread with nothing but a youtube link and not even a full sentence asking people to point out things that could be improved. It can come across as rude or demanding, something that you don't want to imply when looking for constructive criticisms. I sound like a complete old fart saying all of this, but I know for a fact that improving how you present yourself through forms of communication like this will drastically influence your chances for generating response. There are so many people on the internet who will throw out a link and expect and assume people will respond to their work, and you need to stand out from the crowd.
EDIT: I apologize if this came across as harsh and critical. I was just trying to lay out the facts the best I could, and hope I didn't come across as unfriendly.
From what you said in your other thread, you're very concerned with your abilities and aptitude as a filmmaker, and, believe me, I totally understand. I'll give some points that you can hopefully improve on or take pride in:
- The dialogue audio is usually pretty good, but the main character is very difficult to hear let alone understand. The actor may simply not be speaking loud enough, or your mic set up (or lack thereof if it was built into the camera) may have affected it. An audience is unforgiving with crappy sound, so always go to whatever means necessary to have functional sound. Try turning down the volume of the music maybe.
- Yes... the music. I know what site you got your license free music from. 😛 Great resource, and your picks for songs work well (I personally don't like one of them as I've used it before in a much, much different context but that's irrelevant). You don't need to have the music there all of the time though: silence is just as important as sound. I'll leave you to think about that. 🙂
- One of the first cuts you made was a little jumpy... always remember to cut at the movement to try and find a seamless transition unless that's not the affect your going for, but that's not the case here.
Also: what camera were you using, and how did you acquire it? Like man... I've never worked with a camera with a quality or resolution like that before. I'm envious! 😛
I hope you find my comments helpful, and I also hope that the issues in your life right now work out. :/
----------
http://vimeo.com/corax
Corax - I think specialchannel's post here is just a quick response to the advice I gave him in his other thread so we can all give some constructive feedback to his films.
specialchannel - Corax does give a good point with the quick post though. Next time I would explain more about what we will find after the link. What is your motivation for filming it? What did you want to accomplish with the finished project? What kind of reaction do you expect out of your audience? If you present these up front then when anyone views them they can look for those elements and tell you if they felt them while watching.
Let's say you wanted some shock value with the stabbing in the eye and you wanted feedback on it then I would definately give you an A+ on that. I thought that was done really well and looked great. The cut after that (with the guy in the black robe running away) could have been shorter or shot differently. Maybe if the camera followed him or something, it would have been better.
Overall...good job. Keep 'em coming.
http://www.mrgablesreality.webs.com
My site to promote my writing/opinions/and soon movies!
http://www.mrgablesreality.webs.com
My site to promote my writing/opinions/and soon movies!