Alright then this is gonna be interesting. I haven't even watched this yet and you just created a really bad impression of your self with a load of crazy hype! But I can see some of my self in your energy so I like that an ill give it a watch. I just hope for your sake it lives up to the hype your building for your self lol.

www.youtube.com/yoursayvideos

Okay then an honest and open review: Bare in mind this is all positive criticism, and your more than welcome to fire some back at me.

1.) Youve completely alienated me as a part of your audience from the very start with a HUGE statement, that if Im quite honest the trailer didn't live up to.
There were special effects all over the place like it after effects was going out of fashion. How ever I don't find this impressive (And take in to account my enjoyment of film is a good narrative with a well portrayed sense of realism).

It reminds me of college students that make their first music video and used every single transition going because they can! Which brings down the production values of the actual film. Do I think you created the effects well? Yes, very much so. But I hope you dont simply expect to win awards of the back of flashy gimmicks as your film will get pulled to pieces by the critics if you do because it communicates all the wrong things. And whats more if that is your style I would advise you to enter some music video competitions instead as it seems more suitable than a trailer.

2.) Trailers are supposed to be exciting, their supposed to capture the audience and make them feel as though they "Have to see this movie". And unfortunately I feel as though you got this completely wrong as there's no pace, no narrative and suspense to speak of as it took far too long to get to a point where any thing happened. And even when it did it was a man standing in a bush which wasn't exactly exciting :/ so I think you completely abandoned your audience in favour of looking flashy, which is some thing that doesn't sit well with me personally.

So basically what Im getting at is that you went over the top with the effects in this production and would of found it much more enjoyable if you had provided me with some thing more edgy.

Whats the trailer actually for? And where can we see this award winning short film that the trailer speaks of?

Look forward to hearing what you think, Cleary.

www.youtube.com/yoursayvideos

Well what have you made?

http://www.theforestforthetrees.net

ill send you a little preview for you to watch cause i don't want you to feel like Im being overly critical of you. But I used to produce a an urban music channel which was aimed at young males aged 14-20 in the UK through a genre called 'Grime'. So Ive got a lot of experience producing videos for a specific target audience, and more importantly delivering things that they want to see, which included short dramas acted out in between the music videos that I produced.

I do how ever admire your energy and your competitive nature, I think those two things will drive you on to success. How ever I feel that they were communicated in such a provocative way that will turn of a lot of filmmakers on this forum.

But like I said I do see some of my self in you. When I first started using this forum I had a fire in my belly exactly the same as you do now. And much like you are now, I was aggressive to every one as i viewed them as competition and people trying to hold me back! So that I can relate to. And if I can give you some advice that will carry you through your career it would be to let your film do the talking, and deliver your film with that same aggressive energy instead of just out right picking a fight verbally.

But more importantly the thing I really want you to see is that critics look straight past the effects in favour of substance. So ill commend you on creating a big hype around your film, as from a marketing point of view youve caused a stir. But its not what film critics look for, and it'll create a terrible first impression if you took your film to s festival and presented it in the same manor. And thats some thing I can tell you from personal experience.

So this is a quick preview that I threw together for my producer to watch so he knew what kind of music to produce for it. I would also like to point out that there are issues with the audio, and theres a huge continuity error in there with the camera operator filming him self. But apart from the things Im already aware of Im more than open to positive criticism, and will show you the finished version as well so that you can review that too.

Also my first independent short film goes in to production in January which your also free to scrutinize. But I feel this represent me well as a filmmaker, and you'll see what i mean about leaving it all in the video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bErJbE1Xeww

Thanks, Cleary.

www.youtube.com/yoursayvideos

I thought it was very funny.

Over the top narration, random images meant to evoke
"important" (should be in all caps), quotes attributed to
no one, false statements about the director. I got the
joke and it made me laugh. Nice job.

=============================================
The aim of an argument or discussion should not be victory, but progress.
Joseph Joubert, essayist (1754-1824)

quote:

---

Originally posted by certified instigator

I thought it was very funny.

Over the top narration, random images meant to evoke
"important" (should be in all caps), quotes attributed to
no one, false statements about the director. I got the
joke and it made me laugh. Nice job.

=============================================
The aim of an argument or discussion should not be victory, but progress.
Joseph Joubert, essayist (1754-1824)

---

Okay am I completely missing the point here or some thing? Was this not a serious attempt at making a trailer? Cause thats what Im gathering from your comment :/

So I find my self questioning if this was blind optimism, or miss guided energy :s

www.youtube.com/yoursayvideos

I only made it halfway and wanted to turn if off.

There was zero STORY that I was interested in.

I can't be certain, but it looks like the original footage was shot at 29.97fps. Despite the post processing, the images looked too sharp and "video" like.

The soundtrack sounded like it was recorded in a hollow room and lacked "depth."

And the actor wasn't convincing. He didn't have a lot to do or say which makes it even MORE critical that your on-screen talent be very very good.

On the whole, it felt like a student production done by someone who knows how to use a computer.

I'd like to know what the story is about right upfront. The trailer, as it stands, attempts to build mystery of some kind, but it didn't inspire me to want to learn what that mystery is. I stopped at 1:34 and was just done. Bored.

If you want to get noticed, don't try to "win awards," just tell a story simply and efficiently.

By all means, keep at it. Just know that the competition is really fierce so your first impression has to be absolutely flawless.

Brian Dzyak
Cameraman/Author
IATSE Local 600, SOC
http://www.whatireallywanttodo.com
http://www.realfilmcareer.com

This is not a serious 'attempt' at anything, this is a successful execution of a good idea. It's probably just been a while sinse you saw anything like that. NO offense.

http://www.theforestforthetrees.net

Please post a link to information about your award winning
short film. I would love to see (or just read about) your first
film.

=============================================
The aim of an argument or discussion should not be victory, but progress.
Joseph Joubert, essayist (1754-1824)

quote:

---

Originally posted by certified instigator

Please post a link to information about your award winning
short film. I would love to see (or just read about) your first
film.

=============================================
The aim of an argument or discussion should not be victory, but progress.
Joseph Joubert, essayist (1754-1824)

---

I agree with certified, I would also like to know more about this so called award winning production.

And I wouldn't say were offended, id say were confused more than any thing, and what's the "good idea" that you were successful in achieving?

www.youtube.com/yoursayvideos

Although I don't have a lot of free time I have decided it may be best to get 'His Face Stayed That Way' (my award winning short) on to youtube. I will convert tonight when I go to bed because the computer I am working on at my house is slow, I will upload it in the morning. I thank you all for your interest.

http://www.theforestforthetrees.net

What awards has your short film won?

quote:

---

Originally posted by alandry

This is not a serious 'attempt' at anything, this is a successful execution of a good idea. It's probably just been a while sinse you saw anything like that. NO offense.

http://www.theforestforthetrees.net

---

Well, I for one didn't think so based on the clip presented.

I am confused on why you posted this. If you were looking for critique, you're getting a little bit. If you're looking for a pat on the back, you got at least one. Whatever the case, dismissing out of hand the critiques of others is a sure way to NOT win awards. Based on the clip, I do NOT know what this "good idea" is and I didn't see the "execution" of it as very good either.

I won't say something so pedestrian as "no offense," because ANYONE who invested time and energy into a "labor of love" will naturally take offense from anything but pure adoration. I just can't offer that kind of praise based on the provided clip for the reasons I previously posted. YOU may think that your project is the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you'll progress much farther if you set the ego aside to LISTEN to what others have to say and not cloud those comments with your own subjective point-of-view toward your own project.

I said it once, I'll say it again, the spot bored me and I had zero idea what the STORY was supposed to be a minute and a half in and there was still more to go. The image was less than impressive (due to frame rate of 29.97 instead of 23.98?) and the audio was on the "amateurish" side.

Maybe there's a "good idea" in there. The point is that I just don't know if there is or not because the presented "trailer" was sub-professional for the reasons I stated above. (oh, and the actor who didn't convince me at all in anything he did or said.)

The best way to NOT win an award is to tell others just how perfect and award winning your project is. As far as we can tell, just three people on this specific website have seen your "movie" and only three have commented. And TWO of them aren't as impressed as you are. If you want pats on the back, then just say that upfront. If you want serious critique, then say that upfront.

Brian Dzyak
Cameraman/Author
IATSE Local 600, SOC
http://www.whatireallywanttodo.com
http://www.realfilmcareer.com

Im not sure where you go from here with regards to your feature film and your film making career, but one thing I can definitely tell you is there are some very important lessons to be learn from your experience with in this forum. And in that respect you would do well to put them in to practice. But all in all I would say that youve had a fair critique by people who have a real good understanding of film. And even more importantly its these kind of people that should be regarded as being the most valuable people around you, as they will give you a good gauge of where your film is at, and that's worth more than all the yes men and arse lickers put together if you want a real understanding of where you are at.

But when its all said and done the only person who really has the ability to make or break your potential is you.

And I look forward to seeing this short film when its uploaded, how ever I honestly didn't think you was going to comment back again so I have to give you credit for that.

Cleary.

www.youtube.com/yoursayvideos